What To Do When Doubt Rocks Your Soul
“No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man…(1 Corinthians 10:13a)”
One of Satan’s most deadly lies is that you are the only one struggling with this sin, these thoughts, etc. The sin of doubt is a common temptation, no matter how much you may feel you are the exception. To have faith is a gift of grace, but also a command. When doubts arise - not if but when – we have an opportunity to turn toward sin or toward God.
When we turn inward (toward sin), wrestling alone in our minds, corned in by the isolation and shame heaped on by the enemy, not confessions these thoughts to the body of Christ but keeping them secret, our doubts grow deeper and more “profound,” thus deepening our sin and hardening our hearts down a path of backsliding.
When we turn outward (toward God), wrestling openly within the confines of the church, freely conversing in the light, receiving mercy in your time of need (Jude 1:22-23), our doubts can be dealt with – the lies of the enemy exposed for what they are: fiery darts meant to destroy us.
Four years ago, I experienced the greatest faith-building season of my life. We had gotten married in college – feeling compelled by God to marry quickly but unsure of how our finances would sort out. One thing we knew: we could trust in our Father to provide. The Lord miraculously and specifically answered prayers for provision left and right. It was dumbfounding to unbelievers and astonishing even to Christians.
There was a point in time when my husband said to my FIL that he had never met anyone with faith as strong as mine. I had never thought of it that way and my pride latched on to that statement in a detrimental way. I began withdrawing from private prayer and reading the Word of God slowly and subtly. It wasn’t intentional, but when schedules and seasons change, sometimes those good habits slip out of place.
The longer I lingered away from God, the more fiery darts the enemy threw my way: Is God even real? How can you be sure this wasn’t just an emotional experience all along? If God is real, why do you have to continue reading the Bible to be close to Him? Isn’t that just circular indoctrination? If God isn’t real, who even are you? What’s your purpose? Where’s your hope?
These questions swirled in my mind like a firestorm. It was disorienting, to say the least. I had no idea of my identity apart from God. He was my everything from the time I was converted seven years prior. And now, my entire sense of self and reality was upended. It felt like gravity was stripped away and I was floating in a sea of confusion. I was ashamed of my thoughts – fearing what I had become. I kept them to myself and the enemy sunk his claws in deeper.
Finally – I broke and shared my doubt about the reality of God with my husband. You know, the husband who was in awe of my faith just a few months prior? He was shocked. I don’t remember the exact details, but he didn’t take it well. I went to my friend Jenna, and she was also shocked but a touch more gracious. She thanked me for being open with her and acknowledged how hard it must have been to share. She gave me a copy of Timothy Keller’s book “Reason for God” and told me she would pray for me. My husband later apologized for his initial reaction and said he would pray for me. He was encouraged to know Jenna was helping me and I was seeking answers.
This opening up and confessing my sin was a pivotal moment. I began to recognize the command to “have faith” or “believe” in nearly every worship song and verse I came across. The message of an active, obedient faith leaped out at me everywhere I turned. Saving faith is absolutely a gift from God (2 Peter 1:1), and yet continued belief is also something we actively walk in obedience to lest we stumble in doubleminded instability (James 1:6-8).
Make no mistake – my sinful doubt hurt myself and others, and yet the blood of Jesus Christ still covered and kept me, as nothing separates us from His love (Romans 8:38-39).
I began with the beginning of this verse, but I want the reader to really soak in the final part: “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation, He will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it (1 Corinthians 10:13).” I take no credit for my faith as it stands this day. It is God who provides “the way of escape” for every temptation, including doubt.
